There is no other place this thing would rather be; no other place it belongs really. I knew it the second it crawled into my domain and pleaded to be useful to me. Useful? Useful like licking the filth from my boot sole, swallowing my hot ash and eating my cigarette butts? If I feel generous I might spit into it’s mouth so it can swallow up my trash a little better. It’s good to keep one’s garbage dispose-all well lubricated. You never know what I might need to flush down that tube!
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