“Let’s get real. Even if a woman like me went on a mercy date with you, you’d fondle my stockings and blubber in your undies before we even kissed. Admit it: You’re still a virgin and a mama’s boy. Well, loser. I’m feeling merciful. I’ll be your ‘pretend girlfriend’ — …
Hey Virgin Mama’s Boy: Tessa Offers to Be Your ‘Pretend Girlfriend’
